Favourite Horrible Histories Sketches: George IV Solo Career. [x]

Actresses, and duchesses! The great loves of my life! I love more girls that I ate pies, but I couldn’t stand my wife.

Favourite Horrible Histories Sketches: Rulers Song/King and Queens of Britain [x]

Still to come it’s Queen Victoria!

From the day we arrive on the planet, blinking, step into the sun… There’s more to see than can ever be seen, more to do than can ever be done. There’s far too much to take in here, more to find than can ever be found. But the sun rolling high, through the sapphire sky, keeps great and small on the endless round - It’s the circle of life.

Stayin’ out ‘till eleven, when my curfew is ten~
“Goodnight sweetie, sleep well!”
SHUT UP MUM, I’M ON MSN!!

Let’s not fight, I’m tired can’t we just sleep, tonight?

You what made? Quarter pounder, is it? It’s a quarterback, mate. What? You thought he was a burger, take the shame! Quarter pounder, you want some fries with that?

The Doctor: Haven’t you got a mobile?
Donna: It’s my weddin’ dress - it doesn’t have pockets. Who has pockets? Have you ever seen a bride with pockets? When I went to my fitting, the one thing I forgot to say was “GIVE ME POCKETS!”

Dear Mary Daisy Dinkle, there is something I have to tell you which will explain why I have not written. Each time I received one of your letters, I had a severe anxiety attack. This is because recently, while I was in a mental institution, they diagnosed that I have a new thing called Asperger’s syndrome, which is a neurobiological, pervasive, developmental disability. I prefer “Aspie” for short. I will now list some of the traits of an Aspie.

1. I find the world very confusing and chaotic because my mind is very literal and logical.
2. I have trouble understanding the expressions on people’s faces. When I was younger, I made a book to help me when I was confused.
3. I have bad handwriting, am hypersensitive, clumsy, and can get very… concerned.
4. I like solving problems. Ivy said this is a good thing.
5. I have trouble expressing my emotions.

Dr. Bernard Hazelhof says my brain is defective, but one day there will be a cure for my disability. I do not like it when he says this. I do not feel disabled, defective or I need to be cured. I like being an Aspie. It would be like trying to change the colour of my eyes. There is one thing I wish I could change, however. I wish I could cry properly. I squeeze and squeeze but nothing comes out. I cry when I cut onions, but this does not count.

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